Unforced Rhyths of Grace

Lately, it seems, that God has given our family a season of rest. It's been nice...no scratch that...it's been LOVELY! Last year was a very taxing year for us. No time to stop and think. There was a lot of adjusting going on and sickness. This year...rest. I am extremely thankful. We all needed it. Our souls and body were weary.

It's been interesting because the rest hasn't come in forms that I would have chosen but I think they have been more effective than my chosen route. For example, Shaun lost his job in July and really didn't have work until November. That allowed more family time and a forced slow-down. We had less money so we got creative and in the end spent more time with each other instead of just doing things. When you don't have money it takes out the "stuff" element and forces a personal and creative element. We have gotten to go away a few times on different little trips...not my version of a holiday but they both ended up being much more restful. And another thing I have noticed...when we have relaxed and let God lead we have gotten our prayer of "use me" answered in the rest times as well. I love it.
Ps. 23:1-3 says this, "God, my shepherd! I don't need a thing. You have bedded me down in lush meadows, you find me quiet pools to drink from. True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction."

Matthew 11:28-30, "Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Haitian Earthquake...a first-hand account.

I went to school with a girl in college who now lives in Haiti. Her husband was right in the middle of the earthquake and tried to rescue several people ending up only being able to rescue one. They are the full-time in-country directory of Clean Water for Haiti. The first entry is about donating for this disaster and the second one is his first-hand account.
Here is his first-hand account:
http://rollingsinhaiti.wordpress.com/
Here is a photo journalist's blog of pictures. Let them break your heart: http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/01/earthquake_in_haiti.html
and here is his second entry titles "Haiti 48 hours later": http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/01/haiti_48_hours_later.html
Pray, Send Money to a credible relief effort...DO SOMETHING. Many lives depend on it. And if it was you...or your children...wouldn't you want someone to help. Haiti is a VERY poor country that has been hammered over and over again by natural disaster as well as not so natural disaster of cruel people.
Here are some credible relief efforts who will not pocket your money:
Clean Water for Haiti:
http://www.cleanwaterforhaiti.org/
World Vision Canada:
http://www.worldvision.ca/give-a-gift/Pages/EarthquakeinHaiti.aspx?mc=4153730&gclid=CMLR-c3mpJ8CFQNSagod4kW8Zw
World Vision USA:
http://donate.worldvision.org/OA_HTML/xxwv2ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?funnel=&item=1958776&section=10324&go=item
etc. There are many credible relief efforts under way.

Renewing

January always seems to be synonymous with renewing. Starting over. Trying again. We have built it into our culture it seems with New Years Resolutions. Spring is natures time for renewing but us humans like the turn of the new year...maybe we're bored or finally have enough time to pause and think about what's important to us in the dead of Winter.

For many years I have not done resolutions because, well maybe a few reasons. I don't know. Maybe I was afraid. Afraid to put whatever it was, that I wanted to start over with, out there for people to see and thus give myself the opportunity to fail. Maybe I figured that if it was really something I was going to do I would have resolved to do long before New Years and thus it was not necessary.

For me resolutions are something that has been a long time coming. Something that has been planted by a gentle nudge from my Saviour many times. He allows things to brewing in my soul for a LONG LONG time. He helps me process and thinking and wrestle. He brings Godly counsel into my life just at the right time...His perfect time. God has walked patiently and gently beside me. HE is my sustainer. He is my strength. He is my wisdom. He is my joy. Without Him nothing would have been thought through, struggled with, or refined and worked towards resolution.

The resolution is just the tip of the iceberg...a verbalization of huge things that have been being dealt with inside. They are never a completely new thought...for me. I can't be resolute on new thoughts or something that is still being worked out in my inner woman. That's just me.

This year, though, these resolutions and New Years were in the same timing. So I made some "New Years Resolutions" of sorts. I haven't given myself a time limit to complete them in. I have started to take baby steps to get me there. I am thankful for that.

Most of my resolutions are very typical to other people's. Nothing earth shattering. But for me they have been 10 year processes that are finally coming to fruition.

Philippians 3:13 says, "I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead..."

Revelation 21:5 (Amplified Bible) And He Who is seated on the throne said, See! I make all things new. Also He said, Record this, for these sayings are faithful (accurate, incorruptible, and trustworthy) and true (genuine)."

I am excited to see what the future holds in these areas that have been very painful and many years in the making. And no I am not going to tell you exactly what they are. I'm sure you'll get the gist over time.

Knitting and Thinking

Today during quiet time I decided to knit (I can't decide if that makes me sound old or crafty). This was the first time I have knit without watching a movie while I did it. I just sat there and worked. As I worked I started the think and pray. I don't think knitting via circle loom is the fastest way to get the job done but that's OK with me. I don't mind. I can see progress being made and at this point in my life I need to see some tangible progress in something I am doing because as all us parents know it sure it's readily seen in parenting.
So I was looking at each loop made over each peg and I was trying to figure out how to go faster and I realized I would likely get careless if I went faster. For a second I thought I might not care but that second passed...well, in a second, and I realized I would care if the afghan was not done to the best of my ability. As it is there are some flaws but that was not due to carelessness. I simply messed up. There is a difference. Which brought be to my second train of thought...this is kind of like parenting. It's the day in and day out little things that, in the end, make up a whole childhood, a character developed, a direction for a life or at least a framework to work with. It was a little reminder that I need to not get careless in my parenting. If I mess up that is one thing...if I get careless, just like in my afghan, that is a completely different ball of yarn...as it where.

Changes and insomnia

Well this morning I slept late and it started last night when I couldn't go to sleep. I have trouble getting to sleep often. It's a frusterating cycle. So now I am finally done my morning (workout and proper eating and all...yeah for that part) at almost 1 o'clock! double decker big *sigh*! Now it's time to do school. I will have to fill you in on life later...like in 6 months. But for now I am working on reworking life as I know it in a BIG way. And needless to say that although I slept in when I did wake up I honestly didn't want to get out of bed and face the day b/c it completely overwhelmed me. But after 30 minutes of talking myself into in...I got up and am going full tilt. It's nice to workout again and it feels good. I just wished I had started earlier.
I have to say God has really been speaking to me about disciplining certain areas of my life. I am a bit of a dichotomy. I am extremely disciplined in most areas of my life...to rigidity. Then there are 2 or 3 areas that I just have NO discipline. I was thinking about this over the holidays and realized I, in fact, like it that way. But it's not good enough. So some major reforms are in the works. Will keep you posted. :) Should be an interesting journey.
Ciao for now faithful reader.

Happy New Year 2010!

WOW! I can't believe it's 2010! A whole new decade in this relatively new millennium. We spent New Year's Eve over at Dad and Nan's house with my mom, the girls, and Shaun's grandparents on his dad's side. We had a yummy supper and relaxed. It was very nice. On that night I felt a little overwhelmed with how blessed I am.
As I looked at each face in with me that night I contemplated the relationship they and I have.

My mom was there laughing and taking pictures and being her usual joyful self. Words are not sufficient to describe our relationship nor it's depth. Sometimes it's complex and mother/daughter-ish and other times it's an easy friendship and through it all is woven a deep love, bond, and strength. We have weathered A LOT together. My mom has stood by me and loved me and lavished her affection on me through thick and thin. And now she does the same to my husband and my children. I draw from her wisdom and grace often and I am thankful to be able to do that. I am blessed to have her as my mom and my friend.

Shaun...my best friend, my love, my joy. We have now been married 11 + years. There is a strength and a depth in our marriage that is pure joy and delight to me. Shaun is the one that I can't wait to share any little thing and every big thing that comes my way. I love how he loves our girls. He is the best daddy a mama could ever pray to have for her children. I look forward to the journey by his side. I am blessed to have him as my husband, my soul mate, and to parent our girls with him.

My beautiful angel-girl Mercedes...what can I say? She's one of the two most delightful children I have ever had the privilege to meet. She has a beautiful voice. She is so very sweet. She is so sensitive and loving. She sees people...I mean really sees them and she loves them. She has a compassionate heart. She sees the many layers of a person even the undertones. She is a good listener. She adds such a richness and joy to my life. I look forward to getting to know her and watch her become the mighty warrior princess I know she will be for her King.

My beautiful princess Portia...my other delight who fills our days with laughter and song. What an intuitive bright light. And what a tough cookie! She's my little pixie who sparkles. A little cuddle-bug. She too brings me so much joy. What a gift she is! What a treasure. I love watching her becoming...well her! Every day is an adventure. Every day offers a whole day full of things to find joy in and laugh the best belly laugh a mama's ears could ever hear. She's my little joy bubble. She lets me in and embraces me fully. I look forward to getting to know her better and better and watching her, too, become the mighty warrior princess she will be for her King.

Our girls are so very different from each other that they complement each other and add a richness to our family. They are rare and precious jewels. I am blessed beyond expression to be their mama.
My father-in-law Cam...We have now had 12 years to form a relationship and I have to say that, by God's grace, it's lovely. He has been very patient and gracious with me and let me draw near to him as I felt comfortable never pushing. The difficult patches have made the place where we have come too all the sweeter. I love how he loves Mercedes and Portia. I love how his eyes light up with such joy when he sees them. I am blessed to have the privilege to call him Dad and to be his daughter...our children are blessed to call him Papa.

My mother-in-law Nan...we came into the Huth clan together. It's been an interesting and never boring adventure and I am thankful that I have had her graceful strength and tenderness on the journey. I am thankful that while my children are not her "blood"...they might as well be. She has taken on this family with all her strength and immense love, as we are, and I love her for it and am better because of it. I am blessed to be her daughter-in-law.

Grandma Huth...I have watched her over the years love her family fiercely and with joy. She always has smile and a hug to offer. These last few years have been difficult and yet she faces them with joy and grace. She has learned the art of resilience. It is good to have 4 generations in one room. There is so much wealth of experience there. I am blessed to be her granddaughter.

Grandad Huth...I have always had a soft spot for him. He always is happy to see me and gives me big hugs and the usual banter. We bonded many years ago in Salmon Arm and that bond has stuck. His ever present good humour, jokes, and sharp mind are wonderful to behold. I am blessed to be his granddaughter.

And the One who is not seem but ever present...my life, my source, my strength, my Saviour. Without you none of this would be. I am blessed to know you as my Creator as my sustainer. Thank you for blessing me with such vast wealth in relationships.

Those are the faces that I had the privilege to see when I looked around the room on this New Year's Eve. And there are many more who were not present that night who have blessed me by pouring their love into my life. So thank you for loving me!

Happy 2010!

My Portia got her ears pierced today!

Portia decided a bit ago that she was ready to get her ears pierced. I told her that for Christmas she could get it done. So today was the day. I didn't realize how nervouse I was about it until after it was over. Mercedes had cried quite heartily for about an hour after she got her ears pierced so I was not looking forward to going through this again. However, Miss Portia didn't even flinch! She is one tough cookie! We remembered to give her Tylenol beforehand (something we didn't even think about with M :(...poor girly!). I wanted to do it when my mom was here so that I wasn't the only adult present as Shaun does not like needles of any kind even the ones in guns for ear piercing.

Mercedes helped Portia pick out her earings. They chose the same ones that M had gotten.

Here are some pictures of my brave girl and her ear-piercing adventure.

After getting her ears pierced we sauntered over to Orange Julius for a drink. We all tried each other's drinks and even tried 2 drinks at a time (M's idea). Us girls had fun, after all, and accomplished our mission.