First Day of School Tomorrow

The girls begin their school adventures tomorrow...away from home.
We've been homeschooling for the past 2 years.  One is so excited she had a hard time sleeping (the little miss) and one had a hard time sleeping because she is anxious and scared and not wanting to go (the eldest miss). All was well until it was time to lay out their clothes for the morning.  She went to do it and came back in tears.  She just couldn't hold it together anymore.  It took me by surprise and completely upset me...although I hid it well...I hope.  I am already very nervous and anxious, myself, about this and have had many sleepless nights since we decided to do this last April.
Both girls will be in school all day. We've never had this experience before. Most parents get the gradual release (if mom doesn't work outside the home) of first preschool for a few hours a day and then kindergarten for a few more hours a day... This will be an all at once thing. I shall miss my girls.  See I'm getting all tear-eyed just thinking about it. I shall miss teaching them. I shall miss the giggles and moments that happen when you least expect it.  I know they'll be home in the evening...but I will miss them all day.  Never thought I'd say that! When they were babies these days seemed so very very far away.  Now they are upon me and I'm all choked up!
You may ask "whatever will you do with all your free time?" haha...very funny! I will be working in the office that would eat me alive if it could. So that is my answer..."What free time?"
 ~let the adventure begin and may God grant us the wisdom to traverse it with grace~

busy Busy BUSY!!!!

Lately I've been...

-taking the girls to swimming lessons. They loved every second and how I loved watching them love every second.

-we haven't done taxes yet so I've been getting that together to hand off to the bookkeeper

-getting the girls ready to head off to school next Tuesday...and I've been surprised at the emotion it's bringing out in me...I already miss them and yet I'm super excited for them. I loved every second of my academic career and I am praying they are the same...that this time 'round they will have teachers that are perfect for them and that they will find a lovely friend(s) among their classmates. It's hard handing off our precious girls to a stranger for the school day. 

-catching up on office work from our lovely time away. Being on the steep learning curve that I am on this is not as simple as it sounds,but we are thankful for all of the work coming our way and that requires all that office work. 

-trying to fit as many "fun mom" things in with the girls as possible all the while doing the above, oh, and canning. 

-growing a garden

-having fires in the backyard and roasting s'mores.

-having family weekends with just the 4 of us...heavenly

-having a visit from my mom where we got to go out to lunch just the two of us...that was nice and a long time in coming. 

-buying 60lbs of peaches. Tomorrow, if they're ready, I intend to put them up for winter...picture it with me: peach cobbler, peach smoothies, peach pie, mmmmmm just peachy peachiness. 

-making strawberry jam (which turned out more like strawberry syrup...but it's still yummy) AND raspberry jam...which is perfect if I do say so myself. I've also been enjoying the irony of making the strawberry jam with pectin and the raspberry jam without pectin...and they turned out the exact opposite of what you would think they would given that. 

-trying to find the balance in life...if I wanted to I could be in the office 10 + hours a day. But I have children to cuddle, cook for, love, and take care, as well as a husband to...well...love...and a house to try and keep in some semblance of order...and then there are all the other things like well...God, my soul, family, friends, eating healthily so I don't just pack right back on the pounds that I worked so hard to get off, and exercise and on and on and those are not in any order of importance...I have no idea how to do all of those things and the "on and on" in any kind of balanced way.  I'm a focuser. I don't know if that is a word...but I focus on one thing very VERY intensely and get it done and then move on to the next thing and repeat. I can't do that with the above mentioned things. If doesn't work.

-looking forward to trip down to Palm Desert for my Grandpa's 81st birthday at the end of September.  Everything is booked as of today. Fantastic!

In all of this I am really savoring the moments and enjoying the lasts and the firsts.  I am spending a lot of time praying.

It Happened in Italy by Elizabeth Bettina

I saw this book when I was out with my friend. I was caught by the title and subtitle.  I love Italy...but then the subtitle read "the untold stories of how the people of Italy defied the horrors of the holocaust".  Now I've read a lot of stories about the holocaust. The last story I read was was called The Zookeeper's Wife. That's a great read! It's heart wrenching. The best and worst of what it means to be human shines through.  In the end I am so thankful I read it.  The last holocaust movie I saw was The Boy in the Striped Pajamas. Heart breaking!
This one was completely completely different from any other holocaust story I have ever read or heard about.  I didn't know this story and while it was not terribly well written the stories that came through were absolutely incredible! I am so thankful that my friend bought this for me.  Well well worth my time...and yours! 

Portia...a dichotomy in human form.

Portia has been driving me absolutely mental lately. It's like everything that is annoying...she does!!! Over and over and over and over and over again.   She's really cute and very charming but when I'm tired. Oye! And I've been tired a lot lately because she has been  coughing at night and I've been up 3 or 4 or 5 or 7 times a night.
 The banging on everything that she can because "I'm making a drum mama and I need the different sounds".  The screaming at the top of her lungs in the truck "because it's fun mama". Pulling down my wedding dress and ripping the bag because she just needed to see my dress and play with my vale.  Taking stuff out of the office over and over and over again and making her own office. Taking all the cutlery and plates outside to play with because she is "making a stew and I need something to serve it on". The other day she was trying to smell my armpits because "I needed to know what they smelled like mama!" of course you did Portia!
You have to give it to her. She is absolutely creative.  She is always creating new things to do and I love that.  It's just really really noisy and I can never find anything or when I do find it it's all used up or broken, or ripped. Like the brand new bottle of shampoo that I had bought the day before...she took a bath and used the entire bottle. I usually have another bottle on hand but because we have had one vehicle and Shaun had been working from sunrise to sunset getting to the store has not happened...so we were out!!! *sigh* good thing she's cute. I think she's been quite exhausted and I've been working A LOT! So that combo adding in me being tired makes for just a lot of ....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
She was up on stage this last weekend at church during the service and in the front row there was a rather heavy lady and Portia leaned over to her friend and pointed straight at the lady and whispered "look at the fat lady"...not once but 4 times.  I about DIED! Who taught her that? On another note she was wearing a shirt that was too big and she said, "I think I am losing weight mom...my shirt's too big." Shaun and I (in the midst of this diet) must be talking about that sort of stuff WAY TOO MUCH! We have stopped! NOW! I sat both the girls down and told them they have nothing to worry about, Daddy and I were just working on that for us and no kids need to worry about it.
Lying: dealt with that this week as well with little Miss P. I asked her a point blank question and she point blank lied 3 times.  Then she told the truth...after standing in the corner for 30 minutes we talked and she said very sweetly "But I've gotten away with lying before mom."  ACK! I was a bit speechless. And then I talked to Shaun and I then went back to her and said, "I will not always know when you are lying. God will know but I may not always.  But if you lie it will always be in the back of my brain and I won't be able to trust you. Do you understand what that means? Life will not be as fun because I won't be able to trust you."  "Ok Mama."
Today she took all her toys out and laid them on a blanket and priced them for a garage sale.  She then came and asked if she could go door to door in our cul-de-sac and invite people to her garage sale.  I love that! It's all kids toys so I let her knock on the neighbor's door who actually has kids.
She finds creative ways to get what she thinks up done...no matter how unhelpful us adults are.  And she has a VERY particular way in mind of doing whatever it is at the moment she has thought up.  There is not an easy way of swaying her from it...although Mercedes seems to have developed a knack for bringing her around to her way of thinking...and she is reasonable as long as she can see the reason.
She is a strong, independent, feisty, and smart little girl.  I admire all of those qualities.  I never want her to lose one of those.  I would, however, like to steer them in the correct direction. Needing wisdom. Pray for us if you think of it.
In the midst of all of that she is a very caring, loving, creative, leader, compassionate, laughter-filled little joy bundle. She is ever exploring EVERYTHING in her world and how it works.   I pretty much enjoy every second...even in the "driving me mental" moments.  I am pretty much always amazed by her.  She's quite tiny and kids often treat her as much younger than she is...but she quickly makes them realize who she is and what she stands for...someone to be reckoned with. She can definitely stand on her own two feet.  And then on the other-hand she has a fragile sensitive side.  She's a dichotomy..and I have to say I totally get it...she's a little spitting image of me on the inside...except I think she may just be quite a bit smarter.   

Excited! Update on the business.

This week darling husband and I have been organizing all the jobs that are on the dockets. It's exciting! There are enough jobs to keep up quite entertained in the organizational field.  We are excited! It is very fun!  It looks like we have hired 2 great guys and that is what we've been needing...one a Carpenter and one a carpenter's helper.  Wow, after so many months (and years) it's finally starting to come together.
We don't mind this type of work....the type where things are actually progressing...it's hard hard work still. I won't lie.  But it energized both of us because we enjoy it and it's actually going somewhere.  We're not working excessively hard only to go in circles. Now we get to go more in-depth in the management part of things and hone our skills there.
Owning your own business is like nothing else. They can't prepare you for it in school. The learning is done in the trenches.  It's long hours and non-stop for quite a long while.  But there are perks too.  You're time is more your own even though it is more taken up...if that makes sense.  While you work looooong hours, you choose when you work those hours.  We like it.  We would rather be building our own business than someone else's any day.  So we keep going. And for the first time we are beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel.
We're a bit giddy about that. And thankful. So. Very. Thankful...to Him who is able to do more than we can think or ask.  To Him be the glory, honour, and praise.

Goings Ons

• My Dad and Rosie came to visit us for 5 days. We had a great time! It was so lovely to see them! So happy they were able to come. 
• I bought our eldest her first training bra. She's 8! Now let me explain. She likely doesn't need one quite yet....getting there though. However, what propelled me into buying some is this...she has grown into a size that is not in the little girl's section anymore and that seems to mean that the material is more see- through. It REALLY irks me. My darling 8 year old being sexualized (see this blog for more thoughts on that)  Come on PEOPLE! So for modesty sake etc. we have training bras at 8 or tank tops underneath shirts. It was a bit traumatic for me, super exciting for her, jealousy inducing for her sister, and terrifying for her dad. Between that and not being sure if the shoes I am looking at at the front door are hers or mine...she's growing up waaaaaaay too fast...but she's so much fun. 
• The girls went to Vacation Bible School this last week. They loved! it. Loved it!  We left the house each morning at around 6:30 am took Shaun to work (as we have the one vehicle right now) and then we didn't get home until about 10 pm on most of the nights. It was an absolute blast of a week.  I got coffee dates with so many of my girls. My soul was completely filled with my friends' love and care.  We're tired this week but it was so worth it...and we have the luxury of time to recover.  
• The girls and I LOVED LOVED LOVED getting to see Shaun for many more hours a day last week.  We probably got up to 3 hours more a day with him than normal and it was when he wasn't unspeakably exhausted. It made us realize anew how much of a grind life has been lately and the little gifts, like that time,...make such a difference.
• Don't judge me: Portia is finally out of pull-ups!  Yes! I do know she is 6! I could give you may excuses but it comes down too Shaun and I were just too lazy to get her out of them. M got herself out of them...Portia not so much.  Anyway, it really wasn't much work once we did it.  It was the year of convincing that was hard. :D. She's really quite proud of herself though. 
• At VBS this last week Portia accepted Jesus as her forever friend, her leader, and her forgiver...she did it before. But this was meaningful to her so we marked it.  And mentally, I think this time she marked it.  I can't tell you what that means to me. I look forward to spending eternity with our daughters.  May she walk as a mighty warrior princess to the King of Kings always. 
• The business is hopping. Very thankful for that.  We are still playing catch-up but slowly we are getting there. It is encouraging!

Now if only I could find the cord I need to download pictures off of my camera so I could show you what I mean!  

We are blessed beyond measure.  I wake up every morning and pinch myself and thank God for all that He has given us...even the not so fun stuff.  In the end He sees the big picture while I see only a pixel at a time.

A Friend in Your Time of Need

Today I got a call from one of my dearest friends.  I had put a call into her and not 5 minutes later she called me back! It was like a refreshing rain (if you live in the desert) or (if you live where I live and it rains all the time) a blue-sky sunshiny day after many many days of grey and rain.
We chatted and chatted and shared experiences that we have had in common recently. We listened to each other's stories...and you know what?  She doesn't live next door to me.  In fact, she lives on the other side of Canada...we are on opposite coasts.  I wish she lived next door.  But perhaps in heaven we can dash over to each other's houses and have a coffee or tea, laugh and cry, and give each other a hug but for now that phone call was a life-line for me.
For those of you who have moved a lot - moving provides the opportunity to meeting new people. It also has many days of loneliness.  Being alone of not great when you're going through a hard time...the times that ultimately refine you. Us girls need our girlfriends.  I am thankful for the phone and social networks especially in these times.
I have many wonderful friends who are a massive gift to me, but this one, she is one of the extra sparkly jewels. We were roommates in college, we dated our future husbands at the same time, we did music together, we got married around the same time, I was in her wedding and she in mine, we had our first 2 kids together...we've moved waaaay to much. We are knitted together through our love for God and doing life together to begin with and now keeping in touch. She is one of those friends who I may not talk to for 6 months or a year but when we talk it's as if no time has elapsed.
Today God used her to bolster my faith, and also to just strengthen me to face the day.  I am thankful for my friend. I am thankful for her call today.